Second Hand Cars

I’m in a little dilemma at the moment. I’ve reached the point in were I’m requiring a set of my own wheels, and thus I’ve started to scour the second hand market. The only problem is, as an architect student, I can’t just go out and purchase any old car. So I’ve been slowly working my way through all sorts of interesting publications that advertise second hand cars. So far my research efforts combined with my own personal criteria have quickly culled a lot of cars out.

Price was the first issue. I’d love to be able to walk into my Audi dealership and drive out in an A8. So something more in tune with my budget was needed. Next common cars had to go. I could not go out and purchase something Asian. Korean, Malaysian are a definitely out of the question. I do enjoy a spirited drive, but I can’t have a sports car from Japan. It’s the whole boy racer image that just doesn’t sit well. It also means that you have friends who will talk engine numbers to you. I have a few friends like that, and I have no idea what on earth they are talking about. I’ve tried turning the conversation onto the style of the car, and how ridiculously anonymous or vulgar they are. And the names don’t exactly project images of vast landscapes, with you inside in the middle of the action of your car. 180SX? It sounds like a computer processor.

What about something local? Anything half decent has to be within 5 years old. And it can’t be the bottom model, because frankly, it’s far too common. So that means looking at something a little older, and a little more prestigious. But I’d also want the one with the big engine. And that means looking back further into the mists of time. An old Ford Fairlane, whilst looks reasonably handsome from the outside, the interior is pure American. That means vast amount of plastic, similar quality to the stuff that they make waste bins out of. Sorry Australia, I love you to bits, but no.

I can’t drive anything American because, well, anything in my budget goes in a straight line very well, but does not go round corners. That leaves me with one choice left: Europe. So which one? Old Jaguars are pure sex. They look amazing, and the one I’ve unfortunately lusted after is the venerable XJS. There is one small problem though; they were built in the time when Jaguar’s workers were more interested in picketing rather than bolting the cars together. To say they were built poorly is a bit like saying Rover was a well run car company. The stories about these cars breaking down are stories of wonder. The electronic supplier at the time was a company called Lucas. Or, as better known in the trade as Lucas Prince of Darkness. There are millions of jokes, such as “The Lucas Motto, get home before dark,” “inventor of the first self-dimming headlamp.” And so on.

Italian cars are also out of the question. They make Jaguar’s look reliable. A close friend of mine owns a Alfa-Romeo 33, and there is always something wrong with it. I’ve seen it overheat, break down, bits fall off, it rattles, the headlights shake themselves so loose, that you can’t see anything at night, except the trees on the left hand side of the road. So this really leaves the French and the Germans. And I’ve narrowed the list down to two cars – first, the Peugeot 205GTI. Sure it rattles more than my mate’s Alfa. Bits fall off at random, but this car, more specifically the 1.9 litre model, is possibly one of the best handling hatches of all time. You see it high up in the top 10 hot hatch lists. Lists including cars that are made today.

The other car is German. I’d consider a BMW, but you’d have to buy a six cylinder model, otherwise it’s not a Beemer. The only 6 cylinder I’m able to afford is a 535i. And if I’m going for a car with a big engine, I might as well bite the bullet and go for a V8. This leaves only one manufacturer, Mercedes. To be more specific, the 500SE. A big car, dual climate air-con for Adelaide’s scorching summer and that thumping V8 under the bonnet. Coupled with the car’s indestructibility, this would make the perfect cruising car, or even a long distance loper. Comfortable, refined, effortless style, and that badge.

All I have to do now is accumulate enough funds to put enough fuel in the bugger